😂 Humor 🤣
LIFE IS BETTER WITH LAUGHTER!
Is humor important? YES! According to God, “a merry heart” has medicinal qualities “or makes medicine even better.” Don’t have a healing need or some other challenging circumstance you’re facing? No problem! Taking a ‘humor break’ can also lighten a tense situation, release serotonin, and help people bond. Besides, it’s just plain fun!
WE (Warren and Evelyn) often enjoy sharing a ‘funny’ with each other and others, which, as the following quotes reveal, can greatly improve your journey through life!
“A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life.” – William Arthur Ward
"A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It's jolted by every pebble on the road." – Henry Ward Beecher
"A sense of humor... is needed armor. Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life." – Hugh Sidey
With that in mind, here are some random funnies WE enjoy that might tickle your funny bone too!
“A pun is not completely matured until it is full groan.”
“I was so confused last night as my printer started playing music. Turns out the paper was just jamming.”
“I wanted to post a joke about Sodium, but I was like Na, people won’t get it.”
“I’ve started investing in stocks: chicken, beef, vegetable. One day, I hope to be a bouillionaire.”
“In what key do cow sing? Beef flat.”
“When shellfish need to borrow money, they go to a prawn broker.”
“My dog kept chewing on the electrical cords so I had to ground him. He’s doing better currently and conducting himself properly.”
“The umbrella was originally going to be called just the “brella” …but the inventor hesitated.”
“What do you call a medieval spy? Sir Veliance.”
“Books are better than TV…if you fall asleep while reading, you don’t miss the ending!”
“Pre means before and post means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.”
“Did you know that the man who invented the Ferris Wheel never met the man who invented the Merry-Go-Round? They traveled in different circles.”
“If you want to know the secret to playing a musical instrument well... Stay tuned!”
“I was a bookkeeper for many years. How did that work out? Not well. The librarian made me return them.”
“A new diet trend is to wear winter mittens to make it harder to eat. It’s called “inter-mitten” fasting.”
“Vegetables help keep your veins and arteries clear. Crunchy orange veggies are especially good for the carrot-id-artery.”
“My cardiologist was so concerned about my consumption of Hellman’s he sent me to The Mayo Clinic!”
“The fastest land mammal is a toddler who’s been asked, ‘What’s in your mouth?’”
“A sweater I bought was picking up static electricity, so I returned it to the store. They gave me another one free of charge.”
“Every once in a while I go outside and run the vacuum cleaner over the driveway just to ensure the neighbors never talk to me.”
“I’m reading a book about school truancy by Marcus Absent.”
“Jesus slept during a storm. Daniel slept in the lion’s den. Peter slept in prison. Elijah slept while running from his executioners. No matter the circumstance, you should take a nap. The Bible says so.”
“Dude 1: “Hey bro?”
Dude 2: “Yeah bro?”
Dude 1: Can you hand me that pamphlet?
Dude 2: “Brochure”.”
“Have you ever considered… Adam and Eve only got clothes after they sinned… which means laundry is a result of the fall.”
“I ordered a white sourdough bread from the bakery, but they gave me a dark brown loaf instead. Something went a rye.”
“Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.”
“Studies show that cows produce more milk when the farmer talks to them… it’s in one ear and out the udder...”
“I wish mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.”
“If you see me talking to myself please go your way, I’m self-employed and having a staff meeting.”
“I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life… I’ll call it my oughtabiography.”
“If you ever think English is not a weird language, just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme. But read and lead don’t rhyme, and neither do read and lead.”
“As I’m sitting in the waiting room at my chiropractors office trying to find a magazine, I realized all he had were back issues.”
“Who hates speeding tickets? Raise your right foot.”
“After completion of my thesis on hoarding… I was promoted to add-junk professor.”